And I will name names.
Just calming down, very upset, didn’t see it coming. Shaking.
Before we can go on any further, I must state for the record — I consider myself a conservative minded individual. Simply feel this way, not taught to me (I was brainwashed…kidding). And because of my beliefs, I’ve taken a lot of heat in the comedy community.
I won’t go into detail here, but feel free to access my extensive Journal Archives section. Simply reviewing several blog entries will provide you with a greater understanding of my battles here in Tinseltown and abroad.
Now to the story…
First off, I get INVITED to see Fahrenheit 911 in Hollywood (tonight, the 25th), better yet - at The ArcLight, which means no commercials and 14 bucks. First time there, worth the money, not ragging the joint. Popcorn was reasonable, soda was mixed to perfection (seven dollars together, not a bad deal?). And let’s not forget Reserved Seating (we were in row P).
Good, I’ve amply recreated the setting.
I arrive with my friend (Zach Galifianakis) for the 11:30pm showing of Michael Moore’s documentary (I’m loosely using the term “documentary”). We meet up with two women peers and NAME DELETED.
We’re all in a group, we’re all friends, very simple - except they’re Democrat types and I’m technically not, no biggie. I’m also open minded, often happy and realistic.
About twenty minutes before the film, we’re just hanging outside, enjoying the weather and simple conversation. First thing I hear from within our gathering –something to the effect that I’m a “Right-Wing Idiot“. Wow, hostile and aggressive, nice mix. I’m actually on the fence (many issues), but that’s how I’m addressed, hmm. Instead of arguing back (what’s the point?), I decide to get some food and take a leak.
Now it’s time to enter the auditorium, we all do. NAME DELETED, who called me the “right-wing idiot” actually apologized, all is forgotten. Lights dim, movie begins. Let me add, Zach was fearful I’d shout something out or disrupt the movie. Yes, he said that. I’m not radical, I don’t do things like that.
We watch the 2-hour Fahrenheit 911, my bullet point review is such…
*funny at times, Bush was good fodder, his faces are amusing
*poor minorities join the military
*war is bad. I know this, saw Saving Private Ryan
*felt manipulated with much of the imagery (knew this ahead of time)
*bottom line: makes you think
During the film, I’m quiet as a mouse, a few silent sighs, but that’s it. Close to a dozen times throughout the movie, the crowd would applaud with approval, also a few low audible gasps and hissing when scenes called for it. Toward the end of the film, NAME DELETED nudged me with excitement, good natured ribbing, knowing Moore put egg on Bush’s face.
And I was fine with that, I knew what I was getting into.
Movie ends (loud cheering), lights go up. I lean over to my “friends” and say, “didn’t effect me, I’m not moved”. This is me giving it back to them, a pre-empted retort to their “see Brody, Bush is Satan”. This was my finger in the leaking dyke, I knew these people were out for blood, I could smell it.
So we walk out, still in the theater, these guys are telling me to shut-up and not talk (at this point, I did voice some technical concerns regarding the film, unfortunately others’ emotions got in the way of logic). With loud voices in the lobby, both NAME DELETED and Zach call me a MORON more than once. Honestly, I was taken aback, enough so that I’m wide awake at 4:57am writing this (solo proofread, always). And no, I don’t feel bad going public with these two, they went public with me, in person!
NAME DELETED kept saying “Do you read books?”. I said I read magazines and Yahoo’s homepage.
[Books? I see things with my own eyes. My vision tells the truth, the written word can deceive. We'll save this topic for another time. And yes I read, LISTEN and communicate with others, some don't even look like me. In fact, I'll effortlessly battle anyone point for point, my life is more diverse than most (not you, you're smart and worldly) - I've lived in Seattle, NY, LA and Phoenix - been with rich and poor, black, white and Samoan. Played baseball across the nation. Also created laughter on many college campuses. My roommate and comedy partner was in the Marines, father in the Navy, served in Korea. My family is on the left, so please don't tell me I don't get it.]
But they did.
Now outside, more of the moron and YOU’RE DUMB stuff. Then we walked up the stairs in the parking structure, surprisingly their aggression continued. The two girls in our party dropped their heads and got out of there, most likely uncomfortable with Zach and NAME DELETED’s anger.
It was heated, ugly and unnecessary — ending with their mock chants of “Four More Years, Four More Years!”
Finally, I was left to walk to my car alone, sheepishly explaining to startled onlookers that we’re just friends.
*And this is why I’ll never do anything to actively promote liberal causes, even if I support them.
They had a chance to bring me in — instead, I was shoved away with disgust.
