*looks like Lebron has the bong, Dwight Howard with a huge blunt, Chris Paul cooking up some burgers, Kobe reading High Times and Deron Johnson doing something with his crotch under his shirt looking off into the woods for Big Foot.

Love these guys, it’s just what came to my mind. Much love, peace. Please don’t shoot me.

Ok, let’s talk and chill…

Eating Grape Nuts, a fresh box from Ralph’s! Delish with a coffee base. Two cups, french press on my own, light heaps of grounded Columbian cocoa grinds. Started drinking coffee in Seattle, I understand the Latte and it’s metric sizing system. All about the velvet foam.

Again, if you know me, this could be funny, me saying it. But if you don’t know me, you won’t get it. Darn. What should I do? I will continue my path because this blog is about me and for me! I’m solo and selfish.

Tonight I’ll be at El Cid on Sunset in Hollywood for a hot show…

I’m really liking this post. A nice flow and energy, could be my Itunes in the background? Oakenfold’s “Starry Eyed Surprise” off the Bunkka album setting the morning mood… We’re gonna dance all night, Dance all night to this DJ!

I’m returning to my electronic roots, proud of this rebirth. The Chrystal Method is up next and cued for play.

The iTunes Store is pretty cool, it’s like Facebook for sound. I can really get lost in there. Commenting on reviews and checking charts for popularity and duration.

Oh, so this is stupid?? Do you work at Chelsea Lately, almost winning over her audience on a dialy basis with outburts, passion and sadness? I do, and only I know this feeling.

So back off and give me space, just buy my t-shirts when they become available next month!

Boom, it’s out there! This is not a computer monitor, it’s now my Vision Board!

First shirts, then bizz cards. It’s all starting to make sense to me. I’m on the road to 3-D headshots with COLOR resume stitched on back! (several resumes and sag affiliations to choose from)

Font Fabric is all the rage.

BS.com is basically online stickies. Your to-do lists are safe with me!

Had audition for a real comedy movie yesterday. Read for four separate roles. Don’t think I booked any of them. He’ll put me in the sequel, that’s what I think. Hello acting class!

See? No excuses. I should be deeply involved with intensive workshops. So until I register at The Learning Annex, I’ve got nobody to blame but myself when it comes to me managing the Red Robin in Calabasas off the 101.

Somebody is laughing, I can feel it. A friend in a cubicle, a PA on a producer’s desktop, a four-top in the booth or a audience as I’m reading this very paragraph out loud and to you here gathered in front of me.

I just shifted spheres, chills no doubt. Like the Big Foot, check my DNA!

I could do more, add a pic and be funny. But I gotta run, then drive, then run, sweat, eat, drive again, sweat again, walk again, sweat more, sit, smile at Filipino cashier, run, sleep, make calls, return text, shower and condition scalp, sweat, skip, walk, wake up and do all over again on Monday.

Who knows if this was funny? Don’t know. Don’t care!

And yes, this Stickie will be saved to my desktop if you need it.

Sick of these new kids questioning everything with attitude. Just accept it, respect it, and keep your mouth and body language shut! Yes, my feelings and beliefs do matter, I’ve worked on some pretty cool stuff.

Not perfect or super successful, but my resume speaks for itself. Literally, it’s a mp3 file.

I talk to large groups everyday thru my wacky comedy adventures and I can say without a doubt, armed only with a public school education from The San Fernando Valley and Central Los Angeles, that I am far more informed and confident with POSITIVE VIBES than 95% of all audience members.

This is clubs, restaurants, Hollywood sound stages and sports talk radio.

Five minutes later, after reading and rereading….

Who the heck am I? Yelling, attacking innocent readers? I’ve never gone for it. Also never been chose for it either. So what does that say? I don’t get middle america views and hits. Comedians on the coasts like me, that’s about it. They think I’m funny because they actively enjoy comedy. Well, most of them.

Here’s some pix from Brody’s Baseball Bazaar to distract you from my ramblings…

It was a fun night, several laughs had by many. Dodger Dave rocked it! He is so into ping-pong, we’re gonna shoot something soon. Yep, you heard it here first. Tip Defamer, tell them a Brody/Dodger Dave collaboration piece is in the works!

Gotta go, exercise, eat, then do warm-up at Chelsea Lately. Chelsea is cool, she lets me do whatever I want. We rock it out, great crowds, I just stay outta the way of the love and laughs.

Stressed to look good and wear non-Quicksilver.

Talk soon, on the backside of this url!

Not bitter, just journaling

Makes me wanna hide in a movie theater, escape from the negitivity with Step Brothers, Pineapple Ex and Mamma Mia… for the third time.

But we gotta be strong and tough, filled with the spirit and will to hop back up on that tricycle and ride down to Mommy’s house in Palm Springs.  See?  It’s not easy. I’m trying to type serious stuff but I always end up creating a weak juvenile image of myself.

No more I say!

Actually, my overall recovery from whiplash has gone well. It’s been ten full weeks of heck.  Finally I can see the candle at the end of the tube.  

Great fun last night at Brody’s Baseball Bazaar.  Dodger Dave came in and stole the show, like a 32 year veteran of vending in the Field and Lodge levels at Dodger Stadium should.  Joe Wagner as “The Umpire“, it was the perfect vehichle for this man from Middle Florida.  Rob Delaney singing the National Anthem, Denver on audio (using two transistor radios with dueling AM stations via a 1/8th splitter), Spanish and Pepitone delivering East Coast grit with the ease of off-Broadway trained professionals.

The crowd wanted more… dare I say extra innings?

****

Midnight this evening I’ll be in Hollywood at The Steve Allen Theatre for The Tomorrow Show featuring very funny people, most likely for sure.

Steve is a cool guy, funny too.  He does stand-up and is a series regular on The Sarah Silverman Program.  He was born and bred in So Cal, just like me and thousands of gang members.

Ladies and America, you go nuts for sun screen, I’m trying to keep up!

My life…

Two 5-dollar foot long combo meals at Subway, that’s where I hang! –> friendship and beverages for under 16 dollars.  Makes me wanna hug Jared.

Accupuncture and muscle stimulation this morning, feeling better.  Not quite back to pre-accident levels.  But I’m getting there.  Swinging kettlebells and batting with weighted donut.  Also swimming on my trampoline.

Drop Urban Rebounder in pool, do submerged jumping jacks in six feet of water.  Actually allows for negative impact on the joints, which is great if you can deal with rust on silver coiled springs.

Just free flowing, using this space as a journal substitute.

Chelsea Lately this afternoon, then the Fox Lot for a private video, followed up by a 11:15pm spot at The World Famous Comedy Store on Sunset in Hollywood across from The House of Blues.

Don’t forget Friday at 8pm —> Brody’s Baseball Bazaar @ UCB Theatre

Want crowd, need crowd… some crowd?

Talk later, summer school is out for lunch… these punk kids are making too much noise outside my window.  Don’t they realize I’m trying to blog to the WORLD.

Half of this post was true, most was not.

But it’s time to turn it up a notch. Drop the name drops and pick up Brode’s multimedia live energy output!

Yes, I have a plus arm in terms of throwing a baseball. Should I stop doing this? No.

Yes, I have rhythm. Should I stop drumming on chairs? No.

Sure I get laughs. Should I say no to mid-level non-mainstream supportive environments? Maybe?

I’m good at basic cable variety audience warm-up. Should I say no to this? One day.

Do I exercise with trampolines, tubing and kettlebells? Yes, Yep and Yeah!

So what’s the problem you ask? Stress, exhaustion and OCD.

I blame it on my car wreck, You Tube deleting my site out of nowhere and the explosion of Facebook and Podcasts.

This entry started off crazed, then I reigned it in. Landing the post, putting a sane button on it.

Here’s the link for reservations…

Bing!

Harold Night @ UCB –> Aug 4th

Brody’s Baseball Bazaar @ UCB –> Aug 8th

Starz Night in Ventura –> Aug 15th

Panel @ Chelsea Lately on E! –> Aug 21st

National Lampoon Night in Ventura –> Aug 28th

Wrestling Show @ UCB –> Aug 29th

Seriously, only 15 minutes to write this, walk to bank, then down my daily amino acids. Once those chores are complete, I will commence my kettle bell workout. Getting strength back from car accident, will only use 25’s and 35’s, as in pounds.

I’m down to 195lbs, that’s a loss of 17lbs in the last few months. It can be done, and I’m not on a TV show!

Bumped into Sarah Silverman the other day, we shop at the same places. Then this morning I encountered Bill Bellamy, who hosts Last Comic Standing.

And who did I mention in yesterday’s entry? You got it! Bill Bellamy.

My Jewish spirit crosses over into the gentile world. It’s both a curse and a blessing. BTW, Bill is a great guy and I’m proud to share the Valley with him.

Chelsea Lately this afternoon, accupuncture at 6, then Westside Eclectic in Santa Monica for a 10:30pm show.

Gotta run, more fun stuff later!

Thanks for spending your late morning at my URL.

Enjoy It!

Ha Ha Ha!

That’s basically a street joke. Feel free to use it for the aftershocks.

When the 5.4 shaker hit, I was sitting on the auxillery stage at the Hollywood Improv next to a finalist for this year’s Last Comic Standing on NBC. Check back next week when I reveal who that contestant was. Text 1-800-Bill-Bellamy for quicker results.

Yes, I get paid to produce live laughter in the afternoon.

Just free flowing here, thank you for your freedom, patience and support.

Yes, I popped two Lean System 7’s only hours ago. I’m mentally and thermally prepared to induce cardio.

Shows on the horizon…

• four days per week doing audience warm-up for Chelsea Lately on E!
• look for my 5th panel appearance coming up in August

This is a repost from back in January, proud of the Goose! Nice guy, threw gas, pelted Ron Cey in the 1981 World Series vs The Los Angeles Dodgers. Right off Cey’s helmet and into the lodge level. I was watching the game live on tv in Granada Hills, CA at my father’s girlfriend’s house.

Who booked Obama’s trip to Europe? Travelocity? + Hotel and Rental Car? Must have done a 21-day advance. You hustle, you find deals.

Check back later for life and show updates.

It’s gonna be a busy August here at bs.com!

See? I’m rusty. Just not flowing yet. That’s okay, I have wisdom. Been here before. Won’t panic. Practice and recreate the fundamentals that brought me to this point of over 1,000 friends on Facebook w/o the real help of Comedy Central, Conan, Colleges or established alternative comedians.

Not ethnic, or glorifying the underdog angle or embraced by mainstream white.

But somehow I work in the business of show. BTW, in two hours I get to hang with legendary comedian Charo.

Peferct example. Charo is Latina, and she’s a woman. Throw in funny with a little “Coochie Coochie Coo” and you got yourself a spot on E’s Chelsea Lately (where I do warm-up and occasional panel).

Also loaned my energy and positive vibes to Dave Attell’s Gong Show, Frank Caliendo’s Frank TV on TBS and Little Britian on HBO, and of course daily at Chelsea.

But I never do Montreal. Asked once to audition back in 2001. Currently no assistance, just on my own with Verizon Voyager and iTouch apps.

Getting bitter here. Gonna take break, have a bowl of cereal, digest and sit back down on swiss ball with proper posture. Then knock out the final paragraph before hitting the 101-405.

Screw it, gotta go! Next time.

Please read the comments, the wrestling community has embraced me.

I’m sorry I have to bring this to your attention, nobody else will.  

The “Hollywood Industry” is too involved with themselves and/or the artists they are financially committed to support.

Popular, Money, then Funny a distant third.

I’m back baby!!

Enjoy THAT.

Then say hello to America’s latest upload…

Hi gals and guys, it’s your friend Brody here, saying hello from The San Fernando Valley out in California.

Hot Hot Heat today, instant sweat, it’s a new scent from Axe.

Bing! Right off the wiffle ball bat and straight into your Laff Zone! 

That’s what I do, triple blogging with five open tabs nestled neatly within my browser, blanketing iTunes.

• for now, all videos at Myspace –> Click here (my You Tube page was removed)
• Always in LA and Hollywood, TV Shows and spots around town –> check Facebook and bs.com calendar
• my recovery from whiplash is at 92% –> can’t lift or play baseball
• look for me on NESN this summer! –> times and info here

Enjoy THAT.

Welcome to America via HBO and the CBS Radford Lot!

Thursday at 4:30pm I was slammed into on Olympic in West Los Angeles, minding my own business, heading east towards Staples Center and the Laker Game.

Mild traffic, cruise to a stop behind a Lexus…

Then BOOM, I get hammered, crush test dummied around courtesy of a under-21 driver who claims he was hit from behind.

So here’s the deal… bumper to bumper, his plate is embedded on my bumper, my antenna now makes a sound when going up and down, some front hood damage as well, allignment and frame off, etc…

Me, I’m messed up.

My neck, spine and back. Feeling burning sensations up and down upper spine, hands are week, can’t rotate neck, tender, sharp pains, etc…

No lie, not a scammer, just wanna get back to pre-accident levels.

Really sucks, why? Because I’m a good person who minds his own business, displaying and accomplishing non-aggressive defensive lifestyle choices.

Can’t play drums
Can’t pitch
Can’t swing bat
Can’t go to gym
Can’t perform normal comedy routine
Look like I want attention due to the pain –> vibe at Starbucks this afternoon
Don’t wanna have a lifetime of neck and back problems
I am beyond flexible, known for it, not anymore
Depressed and sad, not lonely!

Honestly, I think I broke some bones and tweaked or ruptured something.

Doctor on Monday. Spoke to attorney. Everyone is insured, I’m covered. But I’m down in the dumps, stiff like a non-athlete looking type…

Life will go on, just not gonna be the same Brody for a while.

And you’ll say who cares? And I’m saying, you really should care, slow down and put yourself in my Nike Air Max 360’s (two pair at Finish Line, wearing only one group at time of impact). This unfortunate nightmare effects a lot of people.

These are just some the individuals and phenomenons I’ve been associated with for the last 20 years. (New challenges will certainly abound in my post fusion, nerve, lumbar world!)

• Currently I assist at Chelsea Lately on E, warm-up and appear monthly, sometimes
• I’m the American audience warm-up as of taping #1 for Little Britain on HBO
• collaboration with DJ Dougg Pound (also Dragon Boy Suede), right hand man for the highly popular Tim and Eric series of shows and live events, dvds and the like
• offered parts in most every Zach Galifiankais production
• fairly close with Demetri Martin before he blew up, open mics in NYC
• friend and college teammate with Baseball Tonight’s Fernando Vina
• heavily around New York Yankees from 1996-2007
• created Fox Sports position from scratch, over 1,000 shows, hip and cool at it’s apex
• Man Show, season 4 with Joe Rogan and Doug Stanhope –> respect
• in Sarah Silverman’s Jesus is Magic
• Flight of the Concords enjoy and endorse my work
• interned with ESPN News Steve Bunin in Seattle
• college classmate of ESPN News Will Selva at Arizona State University
• high school teammate and friend Joey Arnold is the head baseball coach at Pierce College in Woodland Hills, CA –> off season Major League mecca, prestigious junior college program, I have full run when needed —> not anymore, my my neck is jacked!
• talk almost daily with 30 Rock’s Judah Friedlander
• early Family Guy/Simpson writer/producer influences, trust me

Now do you see?

My energy and honest spirit, tied in with a blue collar Jewish work ethic produces results on the stage, off the field, on the mound, behind the drums at Guitar Center, in line at Dave and Buster’s or dealing with awkward silence on a television sound stage.

Or we can get weird, delving into late 60’s/early 70’s family crossings with Manson up near Chatsworth.

I just spooked you like The Strangers.

Remember, I think I’m concussed

In town for the weekend.

8pm

Enjoy the Friendships!

Here’s a cool picture…

]]> http://www.brodystevens.com/2008/05/back-real-soon/feed/ http://www.brodystevens.com/2008/05/may-7th-comedy-in-k-town/ http://www.brodystevens.com/2008/05/may-7th-comedy-in-k-town/#comments Sat, 10 May 2008 20:13:13 +0000 admin http://www.brodystevens.com/wordpress/?p=3057 9PM
21+ FREE!
R-Bar
213-387-7227
3331 W 8th St
Los Angeles, CA 90005

105 degrees today at The Vitamin Shoppe in Woodland Hills. Muscle Milk spoiled and my fresh Fish Oil started to give off odor.

But I adapted! By buying a sling-shot and Power Putty at Sport Chalet.

I like Subway and Robeks as well, when they are corporate branches… not the franchised out editions. Too loose and too “back in 5 minutes” taped to the front door.

The music is wrong, portions and spreading varies, workers out of shape, drink bar a mess, etc…

I’m on the go, I’m using debit and please don’t sweat into my lettuce. Seriously, this has happened recently. She was too eager and spazmatic, giving off moisture. This particular female sandwich artist should have taken a step back, gathered herself, dried up, put on the plastic gloves… then bask me with a deep healthy breath, followed by confident smiling.

Show me you’re IN control when the joint is OUT of IT and I may select double meat or even throw in a tip. I’m that cool and classy.

Just dyed my beard, now I’m ready to exercise topless in the sun.

Will incorporate Bosu Ball, J-Bands (jaegersports.com) and yoga brick purchased at Target prior to Spring Training in Vero Beach.

And you say “who cares?”

Well, the answer is not many.

Let’s be honest.

*click this for access to MySpace profile

I care, a good guy, I pick up trash in my apartment complex, then drop it off in a city gutter or unsuspecting neighbor’s front lawn.

Litter: if you can’t beat it, join in on the fun!

Graffiti, scratchitti and dog poo has made me this way.

White flight? How about the Jew Flew? Because I’m sick of selfishness and lack of personal responsibility.

The cursing in public is driving me nuts. So nonchalant, or just not aware or don’t care that a child is in line within earshot holding hands ever so gently, caressing his single mother’s soft antibacterial protected palms and fingers at Carl’s Jr.

If it bothers me, and I work in Hollywood and show business (retail on the lot), then it must bother other movers and shakers. Betcha it does, and if it doesn’t they’re un-evolved and living in a bubble.

What else?

Feeling decent today, back home from San Diego, here’s some pix from the 27 hour southbound excursion.

A few more things…

-may have some live shows coming up Zach Galifianakis, Chelsea Handler and Joe Rogan —> the offers are out, up to me to bite

But I love pitching and drumming!! If I can work these two things into my life (oh, kettlebells too), I’d be honored to play eighth fiddle for crowds not there to see me, but I don’t think it’s possible.

Bottom line, I’m not gonna make it in this business on my terms thank you.

Can we please take down the Drillbit Taylor billboards? We get it Owen, you’re here for laughs and comfort and your wrists look great. Is that what you want us to say and think STUDIO EXECS? I’m back, ok and happy… and would you mind not staring at my giantly exposed hands and arms high above Sunset Blvd?

Yes I said “giantly”. Why not? Makes sense to us. And by “us” I mean me and most likely, me.

Gotta go workout, LA public high school campus, blacktop Yoga baby! I’ve paid taxes, kick me off women’s volleyball coach! I dare u, got W-2’s from 1994 in vehicle gloved department (a cushioned file cabinet that I carry in hatch back) next to insurance card and owners manual, and a Clark bar from September.

-fun entry, too bad I’m solo and on my own in a deep dark sea of URL’s. Daddy, I’m scared, help save me from the shallow end of this turbulent tide pool. Is that a sea urchin in your pocket OR are you just happy to see me?

My father Harry would be happy to see me, and that’s a starfish in his pants.

Got emotional thinking of my late father who enjoyed comedies but not my comedy. He passed (in 1997) before the birth of this blog (around 2000) and my Last Comic Standing one and done appearance (i think 2005, non-sweeps period).

Brody: sunday downer

*Dodger 3rd Base Coach currently serving three game suspension

First off, rocking out to Daughtry. Yes! He will kick Clay Aiken’s butt all over the Midwest and Southeast! Chris Daughtry is Nickelback with an edge.

Seriously, not a hater. Just read the Playboy interview with Chad Kroeger, lead singer of Nickelback. The anger, the issues, the trouble in high school, come on? Really Chad? You were a jerk for no reason and your music reflects it.

Generally, I’ve got more issues with FANS of certain artists.

Hey crowd, it’s okay to share laughs and support. Spread out and release your approval.

We are so compartmentalized and rigid with tags and categories. Instead of just letting go and letting natural positive chuckles fill the room.

Yeah, had a tough weekend. Hard to follow Carlos Mencia and a guy from Jack in the Box commercials.

Not a rip and why would you assume I’ve got issues with these two? I don’t. And that’s why YOU don’t get it… yet.

People are shocked to learn that I am nice. Rare am I negative, extremely and rarely.

(the last sentence reads better in my voice, but you don’t know me)

*April 11th —-> back on E’s Chelsea Lately for my fourth panel appearance. Two more panels and I get a wonderful sweater.

*Factoid: I used to BMX bike ride in Reseda with Slash. Read about the Teen Center in his book. I was there. I think Slash stood up for me one day after a Aryan guy tripped me.

*Also lived in the same apartment complex with American Idol Superstar Jordan Sparks in Mesa, AZ - early 90’s

Here’s a picture from last night that I took….

*aka Big Papi’ at Dodger Stadium in Los Angeles, CA

*will be visiting E’s Chelsea Lately on Valentine’s Night (my third appearance) - Set your camcorders!

Was in AZ and Baton Rogue since we last spoke. Here’s a jpeg diary, starting off in Boston…

*cold in Boston, just before AFC Championship Game

*shoes in Boston, Nikes purchased at Macy’s in NYC

*in Scottsdale with Michael Strahan as he prepares for the big game

*Phoenix Suns Dancers with The Gorilla

As you can see, I’m just getting started here. This is what happens when you drink a Rockstar w/Guava after 9:30pm.

Feeling pretty good, driving out to Mom’s Rancho Mirage cottage for Valentine’s Desert Dessert and a couch crash as I head back to Tempe, AZ for Alumni baseball activities.

Busy, good busy, refuse to complain. But I will. If I see that NHL hockey player get his neck slashed again on ESPN with telestrator arrows highlighting the gore I’m gonna go after Dick Vitale.

Can we now close the book on this steroid crap? If you do it, you’ll get caught and embarrassed. Bonds, Clemens, McGwire and FP Santangelo. That’s good enough for me, all positions covered, blame spread. Owners too, they’re at fault as well, maybe even more?

Back to the action…

*world famous NFL rusher - Barry Sanders of the Lions!

*down with Snoop in AZ

This posting is long, I don’t care, jamming items in, you can come back later. Please let me keep going, nobody suffers.

*Hall of Famer Michael Irvin and QB Kurt Warner of The NFL

*Ben Roethlisberger –> QB for the Pittsburgh Steelers

*where it all happened (who took the huge leak in the lot??)

*video from outside the stadium

Then I was off to the great state of Louisiana and Baton Rogue…

*I went through those doors

*LSU indoor football facility

*end zone

Then back to Glendale, CA for D and D @ Big Fish…

*go right HERE to check out most recent semi-unedited comedy (click right under my name when you arrive at URL)

Tired, this entry took hours to produce.

More in the days ahead, Spring Training here i come!

Things are great, preparing for Arizona on the heels of another successful Chelsea Lately appearance. Two down, more to go? You never know in this town, don’t plan on it. Reset your DVR settings.

Comedy has been going well, rode Atlantic Coast vibes back from Boston. Blue collar salutations in a town known for fresh Chowder and literature.

Tonight (Sunday) I’ll be in Hollywood for Josh Fadem’s Acid Reflux @ The Ramada Inn on Vermont. Starts after 9pm, all the cool kids who fit into thrift and/or American Apparel will be on hand judging outsiders.

I’m in, please don’t ask how or why. You’ll know when and if.

BS: Cryptic Cockiness.

Time for a photo! (lemme check my desktop…)

Super Bowl Week 42 is gonna go off the latches, and I’m diving in spikes first to second base! I’m in shape and ready for my return. Twenty years later I’m back in Tempe where it all began… Pre-internet, pre-Starbucks, Post-Fontaine.

Love my Kettlebells, almost up to two 45’s, swinging them, driving up from a solid base and Bosu Ball. I’m seeing results. Throwing a major league baseball with the precision of All-Stars and multi-millionaires. You think I’m kidding? You think this is a joke? Wanna see receipts from Sports Chalet?? I’m crushing tubing, creating a core and bracing for Spring Training in Vero Beach and Phoenix.

Had a great run with the Yankees, but I now bleed Dodger Blue and it feels so right. Back home at Chavez Ravine where I belong.

You think I’m nuts? Here’s another photo, the gal from 27 Dresses and the Anatomy show…

Ok, let me calm down, got aggressive and defensive. Gonna take a timeout, will mini-trampoline for a bit. Exercise at a cellular level without the impact and embarrassment of jogging in public with a strange gait. (been honked at, and it hurt)

Juicing as well. Aloe Vera, the Brazilians and Pomegranate. Flushing my system, cleaning pipes, peeing seven times a night.

Think I’ll do a couple commercials this year.

So confident, laminated resume and froze IMDB page… this is what I got, book me!!

Hey, this was fun. Let’s do it again soon.

The date and time fell into my lap. Why not take advantage of this rare opportunity and send out a wi-fi blast just hours before the curtain rises?

Very professional, I reverse advertise utilizing several quality assured techniques.

Blogs, a MySpace photo comment and radio in another state.

In other news...

I knew something was up with those guys at The SF Zoo attack. Sorry their friend died, feel even worse for the tiger who got shot by Dirty Harry. See kids, this is what happens when you do drugs and break rules: you may get clawed to death

Enjoyed my four days in Boston. What a fantastic city, very cold, but fantastic nonetheless. The people are real, the streets are old and the girls are very attractive. Hello ladies, yes that was me… Brody Stevens eating delicious seafood alone inside the comforts of Quincy Market.

Shot a sports comedy series for NESN (New England Sports Network) at The Comedy Connection with Barry Katz and Gary Gulman. I helped run the production (aka audience warm-up) - also did my 7-minute stand-up spot that went over quite well thank you. Look for it sometime in the summertime running on NESN and/or available on Blue Ray.

Everyone was cool, local staff, hires, comedians, audiences, etc. Try and get crowds like this in LA. Heck no. Sorry fellow Angelinos.

What else…

Feeling pretty good, will be in Arizona for Super Bowl Week (not the game, I have an appointment that day, getting perm did at Fantastic Mam’s). Look for me roaming the streets of Old Town in Scottsdale.

My Dad was born in Phoenix, my late Grandmother’s first boyfriend was the brother of Barry Goldwater. Some family roots are still present in Miami/Globe, AZ.

Bottom line, The Grand Canyon State and I have a mutual respect for each other. I’ve been known to get emotional, but I will keep my composure throughout the duration of this post.

Darn! Forgot my iBook charger at the hotel in Faneuil Hall.

Good English with Old English listening to Modern English while eating… you got it, Fresh Polish Relish from the Ocean.

Funny to say, less humorous to peck.

Anywise…

I’m into the dots thing again… sorry. Can’t help myself. It’s my personal tribute to Larry King and baseball beat writers. And yes I know what they’re called (the dots thing), just don’t wanna spellcheck right now. That’s how lazy I am. I refuse to activate a browser embedded command.

Epileptic Eclipses or something like that.

Are we done with Pinkberry yet? Popping up, I notice. Can’t hide from the sign and color scheme, it’s in my head for good. And let’s get off the cup cake bandwagon while we’re at it. These rich in taste stores are the evil cousin of a Krispy Kreme/Ebay mind melt.

Yuck.

Please correct me if I’m wrong. I’ll admit, I may be wrong. That’s how sure I am!!

Dropped by Merrillwood the other night. I was possibly somewhat funny at times, spaz-like only once or twice. Some foul language, so NSFW.

I was proud of my speech pattern and comedic take on today’s current events. If you must, I show up at the 15 minute clip and hang out for quite some time.

Enjoy…

*click THIS to see episode

I’m good friends with Michael Cera, but this movie of his BETTER be funny.

I’m just talking, people…

Yes I enjoy Matchbox Twenty and The Goo Goo Dolls.

Please shoot me… with HGH cause I wanna live to 85 with muscles and dark hair.

Okay, let’s talk some baseball and steroids. Sure, many of my friends were on The Mitchell Report, and it hurt me a bit, personally and professionally. I may not be allowed in Major League Clubhouses due to my connections.

I honestly never saw or knew of anything that was going on, your honor. Baseball didn’t test, many of these supplements were legal and fans kept coming out in droves.

I like watching Barry Bonds hit bombs, Roger Clemens power pitch into his mid-40’s and Eric Gagne slam the door in the 9th. But that’s just me.

So I’m guilty too I guess? I think needles are bad, abusing a good thing is bad. I’m into regulations and moderation. Unfortunately, many of baseball’s most hallowed records will be passed, but not without asterisks.

Cheating is not kosher, but advancements in supplements and healthy living are something us as “US Americans” need to deal with.

Clean-up the game, detox the image, educate and regulate.

In related news, I’m really into Rockstar’s Pomegranate Energy Drink. Does me good, helps me drum fast late into the night. BTW, The Barris Brody Overdrive will be playing our final show tonight at 1:30am on New Year’s Eve at The World Famous Comedy Store. We’ve had our ups, we’ve had our downs, let’s go out on a high!

Just doing my thang, as all the kids say. Spots at the Comedy Store in Hollywood off Sunset across the street from House of Blues and next door to the Rock and Roll Hyatt where bands like Led Zeppelin would hang in mid-70’s.

Drumming late night as a member of the Barris-Brody-Overdrive, BBO takes the crowd back to the second Coachella, a radio sponsored event at Jones Beach featuring Limp Biscuit, and of course The U2’s Rattle and Hum.

Take part in the energy, see us live while you can. I’m also all around LA as a solo artist. You can catch my speeches at several various venues spread throughout Southern California and Las Vegas.

Check my schedule as far as that goes…

Got fired up yesterday. Wanna hear about it?

So I’m helping out my friend Dave Holmes of The TV Guide Network who hosts the game show Celebrity Says. I arrive at Tribune Studios in Hollywood for my 9am call time. Being a weekend, and being told to enter the Bronson gate, I attempt to do so. Gate is closed, I end up parking on street with regular folk, then walking 1/3 of a mile. I’m painting a picture for you, Act One if you will.

Once situated and on set, my duty was to kept everyone happy while we taped five shows, some call this audience warm-up.

Went well, felt good, pay fair.

After work, I head out to my car, can’t find an open gate, and I’m not gonna walk ALL the way around like I did in the morning. But, Bingo! There it is, an open gate and a shorter walk than my pre-noon commute.

I’m carrying a tote bag, 13 pounds of laminated photos and keys. So the distance to and from sound-stage, then back to car definitely matters! Don’t you dare question my methods, I’m quite familiar with the Tribune Studios lot layout - I was told to enter on Bronson!!

Back to post-show adventure…

Anyway, I’m feeling accomplished as I head out the quicker South Gate on the way to my vehicle up and around the block, parked on Bronson. Upon doing so, I run into a line of people waiting for another television taping. I recognize about half of the audience, they tell me it’s for Family Feud.

Needless to say, I was quite comfortable and in a good mood touching base with old acquaintances. I work a lot of shows in this town, it really is a small community and the name Brody Stevens carries some weight.

Yes, it feels good to brag. I connect with paid audience members.

After some chit-chat and greetings, I work my way up the sidewalk to my car through the rest of the crowd, most I did not recognize.

But hey, I’m in a good mood, buzzing, why not do some shtick with teenagers up front in line waiting for The Feud? Here come the photos and a few chuckles. Remember, I’m in a good mood, just worked 5 hours, I know half the crowd, etc…

After about a minute, two teachers/administrators approach me and asked me not to talk to the kids. “These are high school students, please don’t talk to them, Thank You”. Are you kidding me?? I say, “have I cursed or said anything offensive?” I go on to tell them, this is what I do, and I just did it all day for half of this very same audience.

As they stood defiantly protecting their kids, I tell them I’m a licenced substitute teacher and that I’m embarrassed for them. At this point, people start shouting my name, saying “Brody“, greeting me with hugs and high fives as they arrive for the show.

It was weird, felt like Aquaman mentally contacting audience members as they slept in their cars between shows, zombies coming out to salute their master. One by one, a smile and nod.

It felt great to rub the faces of these By the Book Chaperons in the frightened negativity they created. They just don’t get it. Not comedy, not life and not culture. Was it because I was on a public sidewalk? Was it my beard and non-Nordic features? How about my confidence? How about the sheltered sanitized students absorbing PG-8 material?

Then the studio door opens, guy with headset (my friend Jason), in front of these two from the sticks, “hey Brody, how’s it going, see ya tomorrow, etc..”

I won. I walked away the winner.

I should have just parked on the lot and kept to myself. But I got some bad info (that happens, no biggie) and I was being nice to fellow humans.

This is a crazy world we live in, but I bring good, so I will not stop and/or change who I am.

Know where you are, know your audience, accept the outcome.

I took a chance by doing humor for teen strangers on a public sidewalk. But because I’ve put the time in and technically believe in my art and persona, I cannot recommend these highly honed spiritual comedic methods to a novice.

*much respect to all those who’ve made this viral video collection possible, names like Neal, Scott, BJ and Cash

please give me a chance, I understand core comedy - I get 1am spots on Sunset at The Store in the Original Room, if not bumped by Mencia